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Enter Aunt Ardith!
In this light-hearted episode of Harpers Falls, the Harpers and the others in their circle meet the newest resident of Atchley Mansion. The formidable and quite hilarious Ardith Bennett! Scene Atchley Mansion. Everyone in the Harper circle is preparing for dinner. The family is all dressed in their finest, as this is one of their most formal dinners yet. Usually it is not this formal, but the guest is quite formidable. Steven is looking over everyone. Dylan and Adam look splendid in white tie and tails, which is new for them; Lady Josephine and the rest of the Schroeders, including their aunt Ena Yeovil who had just moved into Boston are a picture of formality; everyone is all dressed up. DYLAN: We are here. You look nervous, Uncle Steven. STEVEN: I am, in a way, Dyl. My aunt is here. She is moving into the mansion today. SHEILA: Your aunt? STEVEN: My aunt Ardith. She is my late father's sister. DEREK: She sounds formidable, Uncle Steven. STEVEN (looking fondly at his great nephew): She can be, Derek, but you don't worry. She is also quite funny. WOMAN: That is what I have been trying to tell everyone! (The door flings open and Ardith enters the main hall. She comes in with all the pomp and circumstance of anyone with a high breeding and an air of hauteur! She smiles as she sees Steven.) ARDITH: Steven, darling. How are you? STEVEN: I am doing wonderfully, Aunt Ardith. When did you get here? ARDITH: Just now, and I tell you, the moving van was ghastly and beastly tiring. If I knew how to drive, I would have driven it myself, but I am so not used to driving on the right, unlike England. STEVEN: Nothing will ever measure up to England, Auntie. ARDITH: Perhaps not, but what do I know? I am just an ancient relic. I moved to America to begin a new life. London was dreadful and boring, especially with the stupid Brexit ridiculousness. STEVEN: They've talked about nothing else here, either. Aunt Ardith, may I present my wife, Samantha. SAMANTHA: I am quite honored to finally meet you, Ms. Bennett. ARDITH: Steven has spoken very highly of you, my dear. CRAIG: Ms. Bennett? ARDITH: Craig, my dear, wonderful to see you again. Elspeth told me that you had a wonderful holiday here. CRAIG: Yes, it was. You remember my daughter, Maggie? ARDITH: Maggie, my dearest, you really look beautiful. MAGGIE: Thank you, Great-Aunt Ardith. ARDITH: Oh, my. You are quite polished, Maggie. I am quite impressed. STEVEN: You remember Samantha's twin nephew and niece, Dylan and Sheila? ARDITH: I remember them. You two look quite radiant. SHEILA: Thank you, Ms. Bennett. ARDITH: My dear, call me Ardith. DYLAN: All right, Ardith. I would like to introduce you to my children. These are mine and Adam's twins, Derek and Ashley. DEREK: Very nice to meet you, Ma'am. (Ardith is thrilled at Derek's politeness.) ARDITH: He is quite polished, Mr. Harper. DYLAN: Yes, he is. A by-product of his birth. (Enter: Mrs. Buxley. It is time for dinner.) MRS. BUXLEY: Dinner is served, Mr. Atchley. CRAIG: Thank you, Mrs. Buxley. ARDITH: Where's the butler? CRAIG: Warrens is out for the night, it is his night off. Our under-butler, Forrest, doesn't announce dinner. When Warrens is out, Mrs. Buxley, as the senior servant, announces dinner. ARDITH: Sounds interesting, dear. But, no worries. Time for dinner. (The entire group goes into the dining room, where the table is set beautifully. Jolie is a bit intimidated. She has never dealt with a fully set place for dinner. Ashley helps her out a great deal.) JOLIE: I will never figure this all out! COURTNEY SUE: Don't worry, Jolie. We will all help you. And Ashley knows what it is like, after all. ASHLEY: Your sister is right, Jolie. That is where I am able to help. JOLIE: Thank you, everyone. (The dinner begins. Everyone's manners are impeccable. Even Jolie's. She finally figures out what spoon is which.) ARDITH: I tell you, the move was insane. I had everything packed. Thank heavens I didn't have to move any of the boxes. STEVEN: Why didn't you say anything, Auntie? I would have been there to help you. ARDITH: You have your own life, darling. I cannot be interfering. STEVEN: I am just glad you are moving in the mansion. ARDITH: Well, my dear, I have had it living with London. Boston is a good move, and living in a historic city will be wonderful. MAGGIE: I am glad you are here, Great-Aunt Ardith. ARDITH: I am too, my dear. (The meal proceeds with decorum. The scene fades) Category:Episodes Category:Episodes featuring Dylan and Sheila